it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
