Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
You work out of a Hotel?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
