I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Bring me that man meat
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
