Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
