just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
