Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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