these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
