you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
