Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
