i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
