Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
