He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
