i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
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