Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
