garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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