eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
