She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
