FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
