I'm laying in your front yard are you home
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
my shit smells like andre
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
