There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
You did what with his pubic hair?
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