Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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