that's an acceptable place to lick
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
