If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
