hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
