problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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