Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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