She said her name was "party"
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Randomize
