i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Everyone says I win the strip club
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
