That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
The power of my boobs compel you
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize