Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize