How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
