My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
