No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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