Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
