you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
