you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
