I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
tell me about the fingering
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