if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
