Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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