did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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