Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
