Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
