I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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