do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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