he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize