i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize