My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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