shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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