god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
