Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
